Interview with Anita
We arranged to meet one afternoon for coffee...
Me: Please ignore the fact that we are being recorded.
Anita: Oh I always know when I’m being recorded… but I’m
talking quite normal.
Well Declan how are you today?
Me: I’m doing pretty well; my notes are terrible, my
hand-writing is worse, shocking.
Anita: But you can write, not everyone can write.
Me: I’ll start with the most obvious question
Describe the event that led you to here.
Anita: I had a stroke. It was February, during my holiday in the
middle of the Caribbean Sea, in the middle of the best time of my
life. In the morning ,I couldn’t dress myself, I fell down.
Me: How did this stroke feel as it happened?
Anita: I didn’t feel anything
It happened in the middle of the night. I woke up to go to the
toilet. I couldn’t. This was most astonishing as I got up every
night, but,this time I couldn’t go out of the …..where we slept,
and I didn’t want to wake my husband who was lying near me, there
was not much room, I was moving like crazy and trying to get
something to push myself up, so I let go and that is why I thought it
was a stroke coming.
I slept further.
In the morning, I thought I …..
I stood up and it was not easy, I managed the ladder upstairs, I
could walk, I was not disabled, so I could go there. There was not
one person there, no one made coffee, I thought “bad service here”
so I said I’d go back to bed again. I tried, I stood up again at
the place where the ladder goes down and it was slippery; it had
rained during the night.
This was St Vincent’s Island in the Caribbean Sea, the Island where
movie Pirates of the Caribbean with Johnny Depp was filmed. Very
enchanting, beautiful island.
It was very slippery, my hands didn’t work, it was like slow
motion, falling, fell down, I realized I was falling, I bumped my
head, my family came up and I said “I fell”. They said “Don’t
move, Don’t move” maybe I had a bad back, whatever reasons, hard
fall, lying there.
My son’s girlfriend is a nurse, studying medicine now……
They looked at my pupils, they were alright, count fingers, so far
all was good. Philip was up on the boat he wanted to phone a doctor
in Germany, he was on night duty but gave a number for water police.
I was hoping I never have to tell this again.
A Motor boat came, there was a nurse on the boat, she asked me to move
my eyes and move my limbs……
Did I know the people there, yes OK – not too bad, so she said “get
an ambulance.”
Me: So you are married and a son, any other family?
Anita: This one son is like having 3 children. He was making a lot
of trouble in his life, I don’t know why but, as a child, he was
interesting and exciting and is still exciting.
I had to throw him out of my house at 18, very hard for a mother, but
I didn’t want to destroy my family. My husband Philip and he had
hard times, didn’t get on very well, lots of fights and times when
not only disagreements, they would punch each other. I couldn’t
have that, he couldn’t find his way, lying around, room in a total
mess, stinking. We tried a lot and could not talk to him, so I said
you haven’t changed in the time I gave you and so I went out to
look for a little place for him, an apartment .
I said you will sleep here and I will pay the rent, you can eat with
us, if you want anything nice you have to work in your life. He was
shocked.
He went deeper into his dump, I couldn’t see that anymore, I was
not happy but it was quieter. We visited him and brought him food
but he never visited us, maybe he was too proud, I don’t know, and
started to mend his life.
He collected bottles and brought them to the store for money, and did
things which I don’t want to know what he did. He was now in a
position to get work, so he went to an agency.
He learned a lot of different things, he learned a lot, mechanical
things. He mounted solar systems on roofs, he did not do very nice
work, dirt digging, roofing houses, things like that. When he does
something, he does it really well. He is strong and young and has
power, he learned to be on time, work hard, be respected.
Me: Can I ask you about your stroke again.
I know that high blood pressure can lead to stroke.
Were you suffering from high blood pressure?
Anita: I was at the doctor in my hometown and she said my blood
pressure was not too bad and I should not worry about it. I listed
measurings some days, blood pressure was high but not too high, I
took medicine and felt in a good position. I took Asprin before the
stroke.
We had a discussion on the boat with my son’s girlfriend and she
had listened to lecture in university which said it was not good to
take Asprin every day, and I stopped taking it a few days before the
stroke, I should not have done that.
Me: Did you come here directly?
Anita: no, not directly.
Me: Any family history?
Anita: No
Me: Now that you are a survivor, I expect you will be
thinking positively about getting out of here.
Yes, because I am 4 months here, prior to this I had some hospital
experiences in France, which is near the Caribbean Sea because from
St. Vincent’s they brought me in a little aeroplane to Monique, a
much bigger hospital, because Philip thought it would be a good thing
as it has European standards, so I was brought there and had to stay
there for nearly two weeks. Philip got a hotel there, our son
brought the ship back to the owners, as we had rented it. So that
was a good thing, the kids were alright, they stayed two weeks in the
hotel too and then took the flight home we wanted to take together.
Philip stayed there another week, so when it was clear I could go
home they took us from Monique to Paris overnight, internal flight,
it was terrible, so cold, could not sleep - OMG super cold and
couldn’t sleep.
Me: Is there anything from this experience you can take into your
life?
Anita: Yes I think so, take care of yourself, what you take, what you
eat, medicine you take. Live good in a good way, be happy with your
life.
I want to get into the position where I take no medicine at all. I
never took medicine prior to when I had high blood pressure, never in
a bad position, my body was functioning well. I can get back to my
old self. I have lost weight here, that’s very good.
Me: Any advice for anyone going into hospital for 4 months?
I would never go into hospital if possible, I would like to deny all
these medical services, it’s not the way to live, to have to do
something before it happens, you have to do something in a good way,
to live healthy and happy with your life. I wasn’t treated badly
here.
Me: What if the worst happened and you have no choice, what advice
would you give that person?
Anita: I would say think for yourself, don’t let other people think
for you and follow your feelings, follow what you think is good for
you, follow your body and trust these feelings and what your inner
voice is telling you, and it is possible that you have no choice -
and if an accident happens, like my husband’s, one year ago, he
fell from a ladder. He didn’t watch himself and thought he can do
everything. He is strong, so went high up, the ladder inching away
and he fell down and hurt himself badly, sore back.
Never take chances, don’t think it will all be fine and if there
are really dangerous spots, why do that? If it’s too dangerous,
stay away from it. That doesn’t mean that all the time you have to
have fear but, yes think about yourself, eat well and look after
yourself.
Me: If you hadn’t made it – is there anything you regret not
having done?
Anita: If I hadn’t survived? – No.
Me: Places that you’ve been to or not been
to?
Anita: Oh no!
I’m not so interested in going to places to see because when I go
into my garden – there is heaven in my garden. I don’t have to
go to the Caribbean sea. I’m very sad now, it’s poisoned for me,
maybe, I’ll never go back there, and Philip feels the same even
though he loved it so much and he wanted to.
Me: I sense you are getting a little bit emotional when you say
that
Anita: really? You know me.
Me: You have the opposite problem to me, I burst out laughing, you
burst out crying.
Anita: Cosmic giggle
___
An excellent parting nod to her radio show, which isn’t, at all,
bad and it is auf Englisch which I like.
You can check it out here: https://soundcloud.com/anita_ace
Anita: Lunar Colony- dream flower nectar
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